"Verbatim"

My mind explodes loads and loads of guns all for fun. 
Some find it isolative, slightly hated, and I’m done.
I’m sick of your mentality.
You’re mind is not reality.
Don’t judge me if you see me run.
So I sit and try to forget the last time you called for my name.
I don’t waste time to hit the pillow with my fist and tell you to go away.
It was what it was and all because you told me those words.
It is what it is if you don’t think its heard.
It is absurd that you messed with that bird…yeah I heard word for word.
Listen, you crushed my heart…you tore us apart….you don’t think that’s enough for starts?
I’m laying in my bed crying and I feel like dying.
You always think I’m lying when I usually try to hide from this pain.
Living here is insane! Living here is insane! I repeat in my brain.. Living here is insane!
Mom! I heard you!
And I love you!
Dad I saw you
and I love you!
But you’re pushing me way above you and I can’t breathe!
I can’t leave but you continue to deceive.
I’m hurt!
I’m buried under dirt caved graved living space to erase memory of my day.
Let me breathe! Let me Breathe! Let me Breathe!! Verbatim!
(Sigh heavy)
Listen, I’m going to sleep and to reap what I sow I go I go just hear
….tear for tear…
I love being a daughter..
I just don’t know if I want to be yours.
I slam doors.
I fight whores.
I rob stores
and mores and mores
to gravitate near to those who adores.
Let me go…
give me my hand…
goodnight.